Straight Talk with NDFB

Chelsey's Story: Farming + Parenting

November 29, 2023 Emmery Mehlhoff and Alisha Nord-Donnelly Season 7 Episode 6
Straight Talk with NDFB
Chelsey's Story: Farming + Parenting
Show Notes Transcript

Hosts Emmery Mehlhoff and Alisha Nord visit with Chelsey Erdmann, a 6th generation farmer and social media influencer. She also serves on NDFB's Promotion and Education Committee. Chelsey lives with her husband Kyle in Fessenden, N.D., and farms with her brother, parents and three children on the family farm. 

Chelsey is a North Dakota native and has an Ag Economics degree from NDSU. She originally began her career after graduation at an equipment dealership, b​ut Chelsey wanted to come back to the farm. 

Growing up, Chelsey's parents made it clear there would always be room on the farm and family business for her and her siblings. So, she took the opportunity and went back in 2018.

In this episode we talk about:

  • Returning to the family farm 
  • What it’s like to farm with family
  • Why it's important to tell your story
  • And the big question… how Chelsey farms with three active children

Read Chelsey’s blog:  https://ohthatschelsey.com

Follow her on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ohthats_chelsey/

Contact our hosts at emmery@ndfb.org

To learn more about NDFB, visit us at ndfb.org.

[Straight Talk theme]

[00:13] Emmery: Welcome to Straight talk with NDSF. I am your host, Emmery Mehlhoff

[00:17] Alisha: And Alicia Nord. 

[00:19] Emmery: We are your Farm Bureau duo, bringing you your competitive edge.

[00:23] Emmery: Today we visit with Chelsey Erdmann, a 6th generation farmer and social media influencer. Chelsey currently lives with her husband Kyle in Fessenden, North Dakota, and farms with her brother, parents and three children on the family farm. In today's episode, we talk about returning to the family farm, working with family, and the big question, "How to farm and bring three active children along with." Join us for this episode.

[Straight Talk stinger]

[00:51] Emmery: Today we're interviewing Chelsey Erdmann from Fessenden. So, Wells Count?.

[00:57] Chelsey: Yes, we are recent transplants back to Wells County. That's where I grew up, and then I lived in Foster County for a short period with my husband. We're back to our Wells County roots in a temporary rental home in Fessenden, waiting for our new house to be done to move out to the country.

[01:11] Emmery: Thanks for joining us.

[01:12] Chelsey: Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here.

[01:15] Alisha: So Chelsey, if you just want to give us a little background about yourself and where you came from, and we'll go from there.

[01:22] Chelsey: Like you guys said, my name is Chelsey and I have had the privilege to grow up as the 6th generation on my family's farm. So I am still involved with my family. We grow crops and livestock in central North Dakota, and now I bring my three kids along. So up until recently, there were four generations of us on the farm daily, which is incredibly special to me, and now there's three of us still every single day. And that is something that I am so grateful for. It's really wonderful. And hard. It's also hard, but it's been wonderful.

[01:51] Alisha: So did you go off to college after high school or did you just jump right back into the family farm?

[01:57] Chelsey: Good question. So, growing up, my parents were always incredibly clear that there would be room on the farm for all three of my siblings. We did not have a plan of what that would look like, but the farm is diversified, so they kind of maybe envisioned that we would all take a different branch and run with it, but it was always, there will be room for you if you want to come back. Growing up, I was, I don't want to say envious, but I never knew what I wanted to do. Clearly the kids that were twelve and they knew they wanted to be nurses or doctors had such clarity. And I searched for that and it never came and it never clicked. So I went to NDSU and pursued ag economics and I got my degree in two and a half years and said, see you later, college. And then from there it was a crossroads of what do I do now? I still don't know what I want to do. Have this great degree, I could go in any direction there were two job offers I could either take with an ag lending business or go start a data management department with a dealer group, an equipment dealer group, and I chose to go with the equipment dealer group. So for the next four years, we built and scaled a data management department, which was an incredible opportunity. It was so fun. I met a lot of people, learned a lot. And while I was doing that, I grew my cowherd with my parents. So I would go to my job, and then after work, I would go do cows, work on the farm, do things with my family. And it finally got to the point where I wanted to build on our family's legacy. And the timing at the farm worked out. It wasn't quite ready for me when I graduated college, so by the time I had been at my job four years, the farm had room for me to come home full time, and that's when I transitioned back in spring of 2018.

[03:34] Alisha: Wow! So what is your specific role on the farm ranch?

[03:39] Chelsey: So, like I said, when we were growing up, it was maybe thought that we would take different branches, and that is definitely not how it is today. We are all immersed together, and my dad is the leader. The rest of us fall in line and we go in different directions. I really enjoy precision agriculture and the cows. That is my strong suit. Not mechanicals, not working on things, not welding, not fixing things. That is not my strong suit at all. So we have different strengths that we all try to put together. I also really enjoy the financials and the business side of farming, so that's something that I lean into.

[04:17] Alisha: Very cool. So you said you have two other siblings. Are all of you back on the farm ranch, or did they take other directions or where did they go?

[04:25] Chelsey: We were all back for a short time, and then now I have one brother that has gone to Texas to pursue other interests where it's warm and it doesn't get this cold. We're trying to talk him into coming back here when it's too hot to be outside in the summer, and he does come back sometimes and help us with calving, which is really fun. And then my other brother is on the farm full time.

[04:43] Emmery: What's it like working with your family? I mean, obviously, working with family always comes with its upsides and downsides.

[04:51] Chelsey: Yes, definitely a loaded question. I think anyone that hears that laughs to themselves and says working with family is working with family. I mean, there are hard days, and I really value my time that I had in my corporate career because you learn how to work with people in a work setting, and that has given me a lot of skills to work with my family. And we're also still figuring this out. We've only been doing this together since March of 2018. So we're finding our footing. We're seeing what works, we're seeing who has what strengths, what does the farm need? I would say it's a constant, evolving work in progress. We do not have a solid system, but we're continuing to work to find one.

[05:32] Alisha: You said that your dad is kind of the ringleader. Management, maybe you would call it. So in a couple of podcasts ago -- it's funny you bring that up -- because we were talking about kids coming back to the family farm and just the struggles that there are today. His biggest piece of advice that he said was, do not come back to the family farm immediately. Go somewhere else, even if it's six months. Go work for somebody else, go to school, go do anything but come back so that you know how to work with other people. And so you were four years off. So now coming back, did that give you, I don't know, do you feel like you want to be more in that management position? Not necessarily like taking over everything, but you do have that experience. You went to college, you worked for somebody else. So now taking orders from other people, how does that all work? And how do you decide who gets to make what decisions.

[06:36] Chelsey: This is so awesome. So I think this really echoes the Jolene Brown statement that you go get a job and not just get a job, but get a promotion. And I really like that idea that you devote yourself to doing that and you see that you are able to stand without the farm for whatever reason, just in case. It's the confidence that you can do it and it's the willpower to make it happen. So with that said, we call my dad the Chief of Chiefs, which he does not like. But there have been so many things that he has taught me and I have come to him with an idea gung ho, like, I figured this problem out, Dad, we've got it. Let's move ahead. And I'll start and he'll think of something immediately. And it just doesn't check a box. A box that I didn't even it didn't even cross my mind at all. But he knew, this is why we can't do it that way. So many things I appreciate from the generation before me that sees the farm differently, sees the world differently. So it has been difficult in some ways to fall back in line. I climbed the corporate ladder and I had such opportunities. I sat in big rooms and big tables and had a fancy job. And to come back entry level, get in line in ways it was hard, but then in ways he knows so much more. It's such a privilege to get this time with him and learn from him. And with that said, we knew that we have a lot of chiefs, a lot of people that want to wear the chief hat at the farm. So the way that we have it set up is we all work together, but we have our own fields and our own cows. So if I want to do something with my cows, I don't have to take it to our board and say, "Hey, let's do this." or if I want to variable rate fertilizer my fields or do something different. That way, as long as it works within the farm as a whole, I can do it that way without agreeing with everyone, and that has worked well for us.

[08:18] Alisha: That's a really awesome concept to kind of give those coming back, because that was another thing, like the hard feelings of, number one, being back at the bottom, and then also that feeling of, like, I'm just kind of the peasant. Like, I'm just here working. I don't get to make any decisions. I don't feel like I'm a part of the team. So that's awesome. Which is another reason why I love your dad. I think he's just so awesome because at Farm Bureau meetings, people talk, and then your dad, you can just see him sitting there taking it all in, and then he will be the last one to talk, and he makes the most sense out of everybody, and it's just like and there's Jeff Schafer, who just comes and saves the day for everybody.

[08:58] Chelsey: He's very thoughtful, very meticulous. Intentional.

[09:01] Alisha: He is.

[09:02] Emmery: Did you have to bring your own cows and your own crop fields to the family business? Or as a family, were you able to split up what there was, or how did you guys figure out that side of things?

[09:16] Chelsey: A mix of both. So as a child, we had short term cows that I remember, or before I was old enough to be involved, they sold off our regular cowherd that they had bred back, went to short term cows. So that's how I grew up. We are not married to any of these cows. I don't have lineage that goes far back and really tugs at my heartstrings. They're just anybody's cows. So when I expanded my cowherd, I bought a few dispositions and then grew it from there. Again, not married to any of them. The land piece, when I was able to come back full-time was twofold. I was able to buy land when it sold. And then also my grandparents retired. So when my grandparents retired, my parents made the decision that they would split that between themselves and my brother and I to allow us a chance to get started. So we're definitely able to do this full-time because of the decisions that my parents and grandparents made.

[10:06] Alisha: So kind of a little transition now because you have a social media presence. And do you have a blog as well?

[10:14] Chelsey: Yes. When it's not super crazy out, we try to blog.

[10:16] Alisha: Okay, so tell us a little bit about how you got on social media, how you decided what to share. The blog, all of that.

[10:24] Chelsey: When I think of advocacy, it goes back to my parents were always strongly involved in many organizations, and if we would go to a big town like say that has a Walmart, my mom would take her cart and she would go fill it up and do whatever she had to do. And my dad would peruse the meat aisle. He was a meat's judger. We finished cattle, we raised cattle. So that was always really interesting to him, to see what the consumer sees. And I kid you not, every single time we would come back to him, he would be helping someone make a choice on beef. Somebody -- he would seek out or they would seek him out. He looked helpful, and they would form a connection. And to me, that was the beginning of advocacy, that it's one person at a time. You build a relationship. So that in our family has always been really strong. And then from there, it grew. I took pictures because this life is so special, and when you feel it, you want to share it. So Facebook was awesome to share pictures, and then it kind of grew from there. When Ellen DeGeneres came out, and I don't even remember what she said, Ii was something about meat. And from there it was like, we can't sit back and not have a response. I mean, even if she doesn't see it, we have to share our side of the story. So we did that, and then finally I was able to listen to Connie van Bedaf, from the dairy farm in Carrington, and she told a story about how they were going to write a story about her family. And she said that she did not want to be involved, and they said that they were going to write it anyways. And that's what she told us was, they will write our story regardless of if we are a part of it, so we might as well share our side from our perspective. And that's why I share on the internet.

[11:59] Alisha: Going back to social media, what's your feeling about where the whole social media presence is going? I feel like it's just there's Twitter, there's Instagram, there's all these things. I'm not a social media person at all. It's changed probably a lot since when you started to now. So how do you decide what platforms and kind of what you want to share? Because I do notice the finance stuff, so I can tell that's a passion of yours. And now that you're busy because you have three children. How are you kind of picking and choosing what you're sharing now?

[12:38] Chelsey: Most of it, I think, comes from feedback from the community, what people want to see on the financial side. Not a lot of people talk about financials and farming or financials in the cattle business. So that was something I really enjoyed talking about. And the rest of it is how do we connect with a consumer or how do we connect and link arms with other producers in the industry? Advocacy is not only on social media. It's also about giving people the idea that their impact matters. So when you go to your local school board and you suggest that they buy beef locally or you go do something like meeting a friend in the grocery store aisle and sharing your opinion from a farmer, that is advocacy too, and helping people understand how important their own voices are. And it can be one to one. We don't have to be talking on social media one person to thousands of people just sharing the importance of your story, sharing it with one other person.

[13:36] Alisha: Okay, so the big question of them all: How do you have three kids at home and still do what you do? Do your job on the farm or ranch. Explain kind of what a day looks like for you and how you manage. Because here at the conference, you've probably noticed that there's lots of young families, and that's a big thing we hear at our Young Farmers and Ranchers conference is a lot of the kids are in daycare, but they want to have them home, but they don't know how they can do their job and have their kids at home. And so please tell us, how are you doing this, because I am mind blown.

[14:12] Chelsey: I would first say that my efficiency has definitely tanked. I am not as efficient as I used to be and it has taken three kids and almost four years to really, I'm not even at an acceptance level yet, but beginning to accept that it will not be as productive as it used to be. I still try to get as much done. I still try to find creative ways to bring them along and have it not slow us down, but it does. So with that said, I have the best village. And when we had one kid and I say we because it really is a we, we had one kid, we would pass him around. So whoever had the safest job for him, the warmest job for him, the easiest job, they took the kid. So I mean, my village has just been incredible. He would do ranger rides with my grandpa in the morning while we did chores and then he now rides in the Payloader with my dad and got passed around. So now with three, our child to adult ratio has changed significantly. It's much harder and in some ways it's easy to take a baby along because they don't have a time schedule. You're not on toddler time. They don't have snack wants and bathroom needs. And it's a lot easier to tote an infant around than toddlers, which we are learning. But we take it day by day and during the days it can be really hard. Definitely really hard, which I'm sure anyone that brings kids along knows how hard it is. But seeing what they understand is making it worth it. I mean, they are sponges. And it's so easy for them to pick this up. The things that they notice that I didn't even know that they noticed, make it worth it. So we're trucking along and we're going to keep doing it. But at some point I feel like we would need more help. And my thought process to that is rather than outsource childcare, I would rather outsource some jobs on the farm. Like, what can we get help with? So it's not so much pressure on me, but I'll keep the kids because this seems to be worth my time.

[16:06] Emmery: Yeah, that's something I'm really passionate about. I have a two-year-old little boy and just the change in your priorities that happens when you're looking at the next generation is just really remarkable. And the things that you never thought you would be doing and sacrificing for that little two-year-old with snot coming out of his nose is really amazing. And nobody's going to love that two-year-old with snot coming out of his nose more than you or more than his mom. But I think for me on the farm, something that's been really interesting to think about is how agriculture has always been multigenerational and families have always worked together. They call it like the home economy or the farm economy historically for a reason, because that's what it was. The home was an economy where everybody pitched in and worked together and created a little mini economy, which then built up the whole economy. And I think we've really lost that in our world today, corporate world, which obviously factories came before that and all of the different industrial pieces that play a role. But I think being able to take what we have and the community and really bring that back and bring the kids back to the farm is just invaluable. Not just for the kids and like you talked about them being sponges, not just for what they absorb, but also for what they add. And there's just something about bringing your child along with you at work that, yeah, you're right, you're less efficient, you get way less done, but the value of what you did in the day is so much more. And the other members of the family that get to partake in that, just the joy that they have, is pretty cool to see.

[17:52] Chelsey: And I think regardless of if our kids come back, because I don't pray that they do, I pray that they follow their passions. And the agriculture has taught them a solid foundation regardless of if they come back. We're playing the long game here, so at a very soon point, I will be replaced. I've already taught them how to get gates for me. I don't get gates anymore and it's coming along quickly. So the time we're spending now. I see it coming back. Two fold, three fold, four fold. Yes. It's well worth it.

[18:22] Alisha: So what is your biggest piece of advice for families? Moms that want to bring their children back home, say take them out of daycare to have them at home, but they just don't know if they can do it. Is there one little push of enthusiasm that's like, this will help you?

[18:39] Chelsey: For me, I think what has made it easier is that we do it every day. So this is our routine. It is not something that we jump in and out of. They are very familiar with our expectations, our rules, how we do things. Everyone at the farm is very aware that they are always there, and I think that's helped. I think it would be a lot harder if it was, "Are the kids here today? Are they not here today?" And same for the kids. "Do I play all day today? Am I aware of my surroundings today?" So that has been helpful, is our consistency that they're always there and this is just something that we do. It's a mindset of this is how it is. So we're going to figure it out. It's not a, well, tomorrow we have a lot to do. I'm going to find a place for them. They're here. We have a lot to do tomorrow. We're going to figure out how we can do it with them.

[19:28] Alisha: It truly is amazing because it's so much work. Like you said, you have all these probably goals that you want to do for the day, and then you have three children and it's like, how do you do it? But that one step at a time. And just knowing the whole patience probably really extending a lot into that. I feel like it's very helpful for others to know that you just kind of have to take it one day at a time and get in your routine. Like, you'll find your groove eventually. Probably not the first day or the first week or maybe the month, but eventually.

[20:04] Chelsey: Yes. I would say we're on year four and a half, almost year five. And I don't even want to say we've really found a groove because it continuously evolves, it's changing. But I feel more confident and comfortable in my ability to roll with what comes at us. The self growth that this gives you is mind blowing.

[20:22] Alisha: So how do you plan, for example, like, goals for you and your husband? How do you plan that with your kids in mind? Like, okay, this is what we want to accomplish for the year. Do you do yearly goals? Monthly goals? Because I feel like you're just so organized on social media and everything's just like, looks so nice. So how do you guys communicate not with your extended family, but just you and your husband and then also just for the listeners, what does your husband do?

[20:52] Chelsey: Kyle is an entrepreneur, and he has built everything he has basically by himself. This is the first year that he has had a full-time employee, so I am extremely proud of him. And he is a dealer of well pipe and sucker rod. So he goes out to the oil field, sources fencing materials, and then ships it all over the United States. So that is something that he's doing on our yard. And it used to be 40 miles from the farm. Now we're going to be within 8 miles. So that's very exciting. And yes, I'm super organized. He is not. He is a "seize opportunity" and leaps at it. He's not a planner, does not want to talk about goals or what we're going to be doing tomorrow because he doesn't even know what he's doing in an hour. So, our life together is very much more, see opportunity, seize opportunity, roll with the punches.

[21:39] Alisha: I guess it takes both, right? I mean. 

[21:42] Chelsey: It's working so far.

[21:43] Emmery: Did you grow up with your parents bringing you guys along the farm jobs, or is that something new that you've added into your family?

[21:51] Chelsey: No, we did not. So growing up, we didn't even live on the farm. We lived 2 miles south of the farm on another farmstead, which was country, but it wasn't the farm. When you walk outside, you did not see the farm going on. And perhaps that is why I feel so strongly about having my kids be involved, because it was different. Definitely different. We had outbuildings that were there, so we would occasionally see people and they had pigs there, but it was not the same as being immersed in the middle of the farm. So that was different.

[22:21] Emmery: That's cool.

[22:22] Alisha: What are some of the most important organizations or other things outside of farming and ranching that you do that you feel like is beneficial for just you as personal growth in general? Is there any stuff outside the farm that you feel is pertinent or being involved?

[22:42] Chelsey: Oh, a good question. I feel like our life is centered on agriculture. Everything revolves around agriculture. Everything touches agriculture at some point. I don't know that I really have a life outside of agriculture in my family. Not really. We're building a new house inside a shop, and I really enjoy that part of it. So something that as an escape, as a hobby, that's something I enjoy is space planning, interior design, things like that. It's just a hobby. Otherwise, everything is agriculture.

[23:15] Alisha: There's nothing wrong with that. I mean, being so immersed in it, there's still all this other stuff surrounding it, but you're probably like, yeah, I'm there 24/7 every single day, and this is just what we do.

[23:28] Chelsey: Yes, all the time. I asked one of my kids what he wants to do for his birthday, he has a birthday coming up, and I thought he would tell me what he wanted to do for a party and he said he would just really like to stay home and play.

[23:39] Alisha: Okay. So that leads me into my next question. Obviously, now you have toddlers that are playtime toys, so how do you go about because you bring them along. They work every day, and I'm sure a lot of that the work is fun things for them, like getting the gates or feeding or grabbing pails. Even though it's work, it's fun for them. So how do you manage letting them stay home and play with toys versus no, we're going to the farm today, or weekends, or how do you manage letting them still be kids versus working?

[24:17] Chelsey: So the tricky part has been that I do this with my family and I very much feel like an employee that we go every day, so we go at the same time every day. We stay not as late as I used to because they can't handle that. So we would leave early, but there are no days. It's just like your job where you get up and you go to work because that's what you're supposed to do and you take your kids to daycare, but we're going to work and daycare together, and that is how it is. On Sundays, we try to stay home after church or at least in the morning. We always go to church and then we go out to eat for breakfast and then play in the afternoon. But it's just all that they've ever known is to come along. And like you said, they play. They have little gators, the John Deere gators, the battery powered ones, and that has been the best investment. I have two of them, and I would buy them a hundred times over because they drive those around and they haul items with them. And it's been so helpful, and they have fun. But like you said, they find joy and fun in what we're doing. And that has been a goal of mine as we've gone along, is how do you make life enjoyable with your circumstances? That it doesn't take toys, it doesn't take a special environment, it doesn't take a place that is centered around what you want to do. It is for the betterment of everyone, and that means coming along and we'll make the best of it.

[25:32] Emmery: Well, thanks so much, Chelsey, for joining Alicia and I today and for sharing a little bit about your family and your life and your farm. So really enjoyed it.

[25:41] Chelsey: Thank you for having me. This was fun.

[Straight Talk stinger]

[25:45] Emmery: You've been listening to straight talk with NDFB. To learn more about NDFB, or join us on Straight Talk, visit us at ndfb.org.

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